What I Owe
by gemxk2
Summary: Hermione reflects after Severus death.  One Shot. Please R


Summary - Hermione reflects after Severus death. One shot. Please R&R. 

Hermione Weasley wandered her way idly through the cemetery close to Little Whinging. Her eyes took in the names of all the headstones, scanning them all briefly before coming to the one she wanted.

_Here Lies Severus Snape_

Weaving her way between the other graves, she stood in front of the black marble headstone, her nimble fingers tracing the ornate lettering engraved into the solid stone. She dropped to her knees before it, and lowered her head as a tear snaked its way down her cheek.

"Hello, sir."

A sudden gust of wind shot past her as she spoke, sending a great wave of the autumn leaves from the ground to shower her. Hermione shivered. It was like Snape had heard her and was responding.

"I know you thought I was an insufferable know-it-all. Ron and Harry thought you were just a greasy git but I always thought there must have been a reason for it so I thought I"d-"

She was babbling. Why, she didn't know. It wasn't like Snape could hear her and berate her for it. He'd have more likely sneered at her and deducted house points. She could practically hear his silken tones in her head.

_Very astute of you, Granger. Now, stop your incessant chatter and be on with your business. You have a purpose here, I assume?_

He always was a sarcastic bastard. But beneath that icy exterior, had been a man capable of love. It had been through that love that he had placed himself in mortal peril every day for almost 20 years. It had been his love for Lily Evans that had made Severus Snape devote his life to protecting her son, and through Harry, he had also protected her and Ron. On more occasions than she would like to admit.

She couldn't ever remember a time when he was nice to her. Or Harry. Or Ron. Never once had he had a kind word for her, a word of encouragement. Never had he praised her for her always correct work. He had always criticised her for her bookish personality. She remembered, with vivid clarity, how she had been cursed and her teeth had been enlarged so much that she hadn't been able to close her mouth. She remembered how he had sneered at her and quite simply said, "I see no difference" before turning his back on her and leaving her in tears.

And yet, somehow, none of that mattered any more. She knew that he was at peace now, wherever he was, and she couldn't help but be sorry for that. As a purely selfish whim, she wished she could have met the man behind the exterior, she man capable of such devotion that he put his whole life into protecting something that was never and could never be his. The life that should have his. The life that could have been his had he lived long enough. Hermione let the fresh tears roll down her face in sympathy for him.

He would have, she knew, absolutely abhorred that. Severus Snape did not require pity.

"Mummy! Mummy! Daddy says your to come back now. Please mummy, Its cold" Hermione stood quickly wiping her eyes as her four year old son cam running up to her. She swept him from his feet, balancing him carefully on her hip, so he wouldn't knock into her again pregnant stomach. Hermione used her free left hand to pull down the child's hat more firmly over his head. He had inherited his fathers red hair and her eyes. His cheeks rosy from a combination of the icy cold autumn weather, and his exertions running to his beloved mother.

"What have I told you about your hat?" Hermione pulled an exasperated face at the cheeky little boy and he laughed at her. "Not that cold mummy, don't wanna wear it!"

Hermione fixed him with a glare Snape would have been proud of. ⌠You will wear it. When you are older you may do as you wish, but right now I am your mother and you will do as I say, is that clear?"

He nodded and Hermione's face broke into a smile.

"Good boy." she kissed his cheek as she lowered him to the floor. "Now go back to daddy. I'll be over in a minute." she patted his little head as he ran towards Ron, shouting for his daddy as loud as he could.

Hermione turned back to the stone and looked down at it compassionately.

"Its because of you that I have all that I have. Without you, I would have been dead so many times over. For this, I thank you. Nothing will ever compare to what you have done for Harry, Ron and me." She leaned down and kissed the cool black marble.

"Thank you"

Without a second glance back, Hermione turned and walked away, back to her waiting family.


End file.
